Going to meet a murderer, one who had gone around and happily dragged men and women off to prison would not be something that I would be anxious to do...
And yet, that is exactly what God asked a man to do. Let's back up. The story of the conversion of Saul, from hater and persecutor of Christians to one that was chosen by the Lord to take the gospel to the gentiles (those of us Christians who are not of Jewish heritage) always grips my heart.
Saul's story is brought to us in Acts 6:58. He is first introduced to us as a young man, who is present during a gruesome murder. The man who is being murdered, by stoning (not a great way to go, if you can imagine people throwing rocks at you until you die) is guilty only of being a Christian. The religious rulers accuse him of "blasphemy" but that is their "catch all" so to speak for imprisoning/getting rid of anyone who doesn't share their views on a certain subject. In this case the man who is being murdered is named Stephen. In fact though the Christian church is still very young, he has been appointed to an important post. That of a deacon. There were 6 other young men chosen as well that were "...full of the Holy Spirit and wisdom" according to Acts 6:3. The deacons job was to make sure that all the believers, Jewish and Gentile alike had their physical needs taken care of. Some were widows and lacked food, maybe others needed clothing. The deacons job was to help take care of these needs. This freed up the apostles to preach the good news of Jesus love, without being interrupted constantly to settle squabbles about who had gotten more food.
During his short time as a deacon, Stephen "...full of faith and power, did great wonders and signs among the people." Acts 6:8. Apparently the religious rulers got wind of these "great wonders" and "signs." Still remembering Jesus and His followers, they had no intention of watching history repeat itself. They decided to try to squelch this new movement. These same "religious" authorities still operated under the same influence that they had when they pushed for the crucifixion of Christ. They were under the influence of Satan. They had no qualms with lying. Sad but true. So in Stephen's case "...they secretly induced men to say, “We have heard him speak blasphemous words against Moses and God.” 12 And they stirred up the people, the elders, and the scribes; and they came upon him, seized him, and brought him to the council. 13 They also set up false witnesses who said, “This man does not cease to speak blasphemous words against this holy place and the law; 14 for we have heard him say that this Jesus of Nazareth will destroy this place and change the customs which Moses delivered to us.” Acts 6:11-14.
At Stephen's "trial" he recounts how God has taken care of His people from Abraham to modern day Israel. This only angered them further, "When they heard these things they were cut to the heart, and they gnashed at him with their teeth. 55 But he, being full of the Holy Spirit, gazed into heaven and saw the glory of God, and Jesus standing at the right hand of God, 56 and said, “Look! I see the heavens opened and the Son of Man standing at the right hand of God! 57 Then they cried out with a loud voice, stopped their ears, and ran at him with one accord; 58 and they cast him out of the city and stoned him. And the witnesses laid down their clothes at the feet of a young man named Saul. Acts 7:54-58.
So this is where we find Saul. Standing in the presence of men being led by the influence of Satan to kill the very one who was saying things that convicted their hearts. Interesting isn't it? Often when we hear things that convict us we want to fight back. At least internally. Now, back to Saul. As the stoning was in progress the "witnesses" laid their clothes down at Saul's feet. So he was very much present during the murder. Watching. I wonder what he was thinking. It doesn't take long for us to find out. The bible tells us in Acts 8:1 that Saul was "consenting to his death." So he had no problem with the murder of innocent Christians. In fact, he liked it and fully supported it.
Acts 8 tells us that there was a "great persecution" that rose up against the church. And Saul? Well he was in the thick of it. "As for Saul, he made havoc of the church, entering every house, and dragging off men and women, committing them to prison." Acts 8:3. So exposure to murder at a young age has only inspired him to further persecute the Christians.
It's interesting that every time the Jewish leaders tried to "squelch" the Christian movement that the little church only grew. We see that time and time again in the history of the church. Remember the persecution by the Romans? Christians fed to wild animals and put on poles and lit on fire? The church only grew. So while Saul is busy persecuting the Christians as they fled Jerusalem and moved to different parts of the world they took the gospel went with them.
Saul decided to pursue some Christians who were not in the area of Jerusalem. "Then Saul, still breathing threats and murder against the disciples of the Lord, went to the high priest 2 and asked letters from him to the synagogues of Damascus, so that if he found any who were of the Way, whether men or women, he might bring them bound to Jerusalem." Acts 9:1-2. The followers of Jesus were called "the Way." It should be frightening to note that religious authorities were in agreement with people being arrested or murdered to begin with.
So Saul, and the men who were traveling with him headed to Damascus. But that's where God stopped him. As he's finally getting close to Damascus a bright light shines down from heaven. He falls to the ground and hears a voice speaking to him. “Saul, Saul, why are you persecuting Me?” 5 And he said, “Who are You, Lord?...” Acts 9:4-5. It's interesting to me that he says "Who are You, Lord?" Almost as if he is suddenly aware of who is really talking to him but he's just trying to make sure. The conversation continues "...Then the Lord said, “I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting. It is hard for you to kick against the goads.”" Acts 9:5 A goad was a sharp, pointed stick that could be used for driving cattle. A goad can also be described as provoking someone to stimulate an action or reaction. Apparently the Lord had been trying to get Saul's attention. But now he had it.
As Saul lay there in the road to Damascus he heard Jesus voice. The men who were traveling with him heard the voice as well. But they couldn't see anyone. Saul finally gathers himself enough to respond, "...“Lord, what do You want me to do?..." Acts 9:6. The Lord instructs him to proceed to Damascus and then tells Saul that he will be instructed what to do. So Saul gets up off the ground, and is led by the hand to Damascus. The once proud man, on a mission for the religious rulers to seek and imprison the Christians is now blind. He no longer is in control, he can't even see to walk. So the men with him lead him by the hand into the city. How embarrassing for Saul.
When he enters the city he is taken to the house of a man named Judas who lived on Straight Street. And there he sits in physical darkness for three days. He doesn't eat or drink. That is a lot of time to think. While he sits in darkness the Lord speaks to another man, a Christian, named Ananias. "...and to him the Lord said in a vision, “Ananias.” And he said, “Here I am, Lord.” 11 So the Lord said to him, “Arise and go to the street called Straight, and inquire at the house of Judas for one called Saul of Tarsus, for behold, he is praying. 12 And in a vision he has seen a man named Ananias coming in and putting his hand on him, so that he might receive his sight.”
So here is the beautiful part. Ananias is being called to go help Saul, the one who has been throwing Christians into prison. Only the Lord could call him to do that. Only the Lord could give him the strength to do it. Ananias is not convinced about going. Even though the Lord himself has asked him to go in a vision. Still he is fearful. "13 Then Ananias answered, “Lord, I have heard from many about this man, how much harm he has done to Your saints in Jerusalem. 14 And here he has authority from the chief priests to bind all who call on Your name.” Acts 9:13-14.
It's okay to question sometimes. In fact that's normal for us as humans. We don't always understand, in fact most times we probably don't. But Jesus has a special mission for Ananias. He wants to use Ananias as a conduit to heal Saul. Both physically and spiritually. The Lord is patient with Ananias, and explains why He wants to use him. "“Go, for he is a chosen vessel of Mine to bear My name before Gentiles, kings, and the children of Israel. 16 For I will show him how many things he must suffer for My name’s sake.” Acts 9:15-16.
And when God says "Go", we should always go. And Ananias did. Not only does he go, but he recognizes Saul as his brother in Christ, and calls him that. When he lays his hands on Saul his sight is restored. Then Saul is baptized. After eating, he spends time there with the disciples in Damascus. Not hunting them down, to haul them back to Jerusalem in chains, but spending time with them learning about Jesus. The ultimate one that Saul was persecuting. And the bible tell us that immediately he started preaching about Christ. You see he had received the good news of the gospel for himself. He had learned that Jesus was born, lived a perfect life, died a perfect death, and then was resurrected. And that after his resurrection he met with his disciples, then went to heaven to prepare a forever home for us.
Realizing where we are is important. I hope that if I were called like Ananias that I would be willing to go. What if Ananias refused to go to Saul? What if Saul heard about Jesus and didn't believe? Because of that convergence on Straight street, the world came to know about a man named Paul. Once Saul, but after his conversion known as Paul. But more importantly the man named Paul took the good news of Jesus to the world.
All texts are taken from the New King James version of the Bible.